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Rules of the Ankh-Morpork & District Scouting Association (Not Affiliated)

  1. A Scout must obey up to a point.
  2. A Scout must be honest & true even when an alternative presents itself.
  3. A Scout must greet all creatures and species as friend, or if not exactly a friend, at least not as a target. Regrettably this applies particularly to Trolls and Dwarves. There is no room for Koom Valley in the Scout Hut, and do remember that the Überwald Playgroup Association has the room after us.
  4. A Scout must never swear or use profane language, signs, or gestures even if he is in a position to believe that the rest of the pack won't understand what he is saying.
  5. A Scout must be clean and bathe or sandblast at least once a month. Troll Scouts in particular should not adopt the fashion for body carvings and promiscuous growth of lichens. Dwarf Scouts should wear clean under-leathers on all public occasions.
  6. A Scout must never change shape in front of other Scouts unless instructed to do so by his or her patrol leader.
  7. A Scout must abjure the Demon Drink and all other substances that degrade the intellect and befuddle the senses. viz Slab, Scrape, Sliver, and any other narcotics, potion, weeds, or recreational drug or drink. Scouts of the Überwald pack will not need telling what they must abjure.
  8. A Scout must be pure in mind and not succumb to urges, especially if brought on by any of the above.
  9. A Scout must keep his/ her/ its hands visible at all times.
  10. A Scout must be polite and never expectorate in a public place
  11. Scouts who have joined the Thieves' Guild Troup are allowed to practice their craft as part of normal Scouting activities, on the strict condition that everything is returned to its rightful owner after the flag has been lowered.
  12. Scout Knives are an acceptable part of the Scouts dress, but should be of a length not greater than 30 inches. Battle Axes of a weight not greater than 8 pounds and clubs of a weight not greater than 10 pounds are also acceptable.

Ankh-Morpork & District Scouting Association Oath

I promise to obey the Scout Lore and do my duty to [insert name of deity or preferred alternative] and the Patrician/Low King/Diamond King /other.

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